Husbands, wives, boyfriends and girlfriends it is time to wake up. Whether your relationship is progressing fine, or hitting all sorts of bumps you can’t expect fireworks if you don’t light new fuses every now and again. That significant other may be well aware you’re all about them but any relationship needs consistent sparks to keep jetting along.
Thus, I present to you some acts, actions, and things that are bound to get you positive returns on your investment. And please, share with us yours in the comment section.
Here we go.
Pick up her dry cleaning.
Steal his keys…have his vehicle detailed ( after you’ve knocked his #@^& out) (Two rounds, no one and done)
Note the designer of her bag…give her a gift certificate to the retailer
Put his favorite six-pack in your fridge
(No brainer fellas) give her a gift certificate to Vicky Secrets
Take his dog on a walk…..keep going to the groomer ( a way to a man’s heart can be through his dog) don’t laugh…ask some women
Wash the dishes (Fellas!!!!!) then put them away
Make her coffee..well hell since you are in the kitchen, make her breakfast
Write (DO NOT TYPE ANYTHING) her or him a handwritten note of sweet nothings
Buy a key chain fob with her/ his name on it and add it to your key ring.
Cut her grass, trim her hedges ( wear an A shirt and sweat while you are doing it)
Catch a sale @ Home Depot or Lowes buy him a power tool (no brainer ladies)…just make sure to get the correct size bits for that door you need hung. Men love power tools even if they don’t have anything to do with them ( Man law Thing you wouldn’t understand)
If she takes public transportation to work….show up with flowers, and give her a ride, not home, but to dinner.
Give her a foot massage.
Give him a back massage.
Send her twenty-four roses (that’s right 24/ TWO DOZEN….card not necessary.
Fellas..Take the kids to that dentist or Dr’s appointment.
Send her fine $%&^@ to the spa on Saturday morning (compliments of you) When she comes back be gone with the kids , leave her a HANDWRITTEN NOTE Mom’s Day off.
Send him to the game (Two tickets and beer money).
Pay for her next hair appointment- especially if you played a part in messing it up! ( Don’t tell her).
After a night out with her and she’s worn your favorite heels / switch up —don’t be so quick to get them in the air, instead sit down together, remove the heels and massage her pretty feet that endured those heels all night. (Get some warming oils fellas)
Give them a portrait of the two of you.
Leave work early get home before they do for a change, have dinner prepared. When they walk in the door meet them with a passionate “I lost something in your mouth and I’m looking for it kiss”.
Steal her car – take it to have the oil changed, washed and waxed. Then put the back where you found it. Get big bow and stick it on the roof.
Take her dog for a walk…..to the groomer. Bring said dog back groomed with a bow tied around it.
If there is something she has been saving for don’t buy it or give her the money directly. Instead, pay her car note or mortgage payment one month and wrap the receipt in a gift box with a small photo of what she was saving for. Scribble a small note saying something like “Enjoy that Gucci bag you’ve been saving for”.
Meet her at the door with a robe give her a kiss and then tell her shhhh just follow you……then it’s to the bathroom you go…….where candles are burning with smooth jazz playing and a bath is prepared just for her.
ADULTS ONLY FOR THIS ONE – Ladies- don a mini skirt- increase the ante by adding some thigh high hose…preferably with garters attached… and some black pumps. Show up at his job ..don’t get out of the car ..call him and ask him to come outside (sound serious) . When he comes out let him get a good look at the mini riding high and dirty and say ” You left something turned on at home. It ain’t the stove it ain’t the heater, my man it’s something a whole lot sweeter” Roll the window up drive off and keep an eye on the fast lane. He may beat you home.
Ladies, pick a day of the week (probably one in the middle of the week) find a “play date” or babysitter for the children. Make reservations at a nice hotel. Set up the room with an exotic romantic tone with good night club music. Leave a note at home on the bed for him to meet you at the hotel. Have a key waiting for him at the front desk. When he arrives let him find a place to sit and give him an erotic show. Top it off with a l ap dance and spend the rest of the night providing him with pleasures untold. Remember it’s the middle of the week so he’ll go to work with a few good thoughts on his mind.
I’d better stop now, I am trying to maintain a clean blog here. You all have fun!!!