He entered the system intent on being a passive observer— a diligent reporter disguised as a laid-back, upstanding guard. But in time, he became aggressive, even vindictive, toward the prisoners. He squabbled with the men and sought reasons to punish them. His anger and paranoia metastasized and scared him.
“I wonder who I am becoming,” he wrote in the piece. “I feel ashamed of my lack of self-control, my growing thirst for punishment and vengeance. I’m getting afraid of the expanding distance between the person I am at home and the one behind the wire.”